Dating

If you are a single man or woman looking for love this can leave you vulnerable to the most unscrupulous of people. After all, you’re being open-minded and you are trying your best to see if you can find someone who might also like you. It’s not easy to show off a vulnerable side of yourself. But you do have to be aware that there are people out there who may take advantage of you. These sort of people may in the forms of “catfish“. Who are they and what do they want from you? Well, read on to find out!

What is a Catfish

So, let’s say that you go onto a dating website. You’re a lonely single 50-year-old man looking for a woman your age. You’ve already scrolled by all the “hot singles in your area, ” advertisements and you’re starting to give up hope. But then, suddenly you receive a message from an incredibly attractive lady in her mid-20s. She beautiful, intelligent and is great at conversation. Whilst you may be talking back to her, you may always have that tiny thought at the back of your mind that says, “why would she be talking to me?”

Well, the sad thing is that she may have an ulterior motive and ultimately be a catfish. A catfish is a person who goes online and pretends to be someone else on a social media website. They may pretend that they are looking for love or just need a friend. But at the end of the day, they are looking for a victim to talk to and clamp themselves onto. Once you have a catfish attached to you, your emotional connection can make it quite difficult to tell them to hit the road.

What does a Catfish want?

This entirely depends on the situation and the type of person who you are talking to. Some of them want to get money off you, some of them are doing it for a joke, but the worst of them are the ones who want to mess you around and lower your self-esteem. Perhaps there someone who you have hurt in the past or perhaps they’re a jilted lover. Either way, they’re talking to you to get something out of you or to make you feel bad.

To do this, at first they will win your trust and make you feel emotionally invested in them. When they have you wrapped around their little finger, that’s when they will start making demands off you or asking things. Small demands will soon turn into larger demands and eventually you will start feeling like you’re more of a doormat to them than any sort of lover or friend.

How to spot a Catfish

If you are talking to someone online and are a little worried that they are not exactly who they say they are, you may have stumbled upon a Catfish. Here are some of the biggest warning signs to keep you on your toes

1. They do not want to video or voice chat

2. They won’t show you any pictures of themselves- If they do show pictures, you can trace them with a back search or they look like models.

3. Their profile has very few friends or is made up entirely of one gender

4. Their pictures are being used by other accounts

5. They start asking for money or gifts

6. Their qualifications seem over the top

7.  They flake out on meeting up with you in person

8. They make up dramatic stories to get out of potential meetings

9. Their check-ins seem off in comparison to the details of their lines

10. They make strange spelling errors and easy mistakes

Cutting off a Catfish

Once you have identified a catfish, or have had it confirmed that they are not who they say they are, you need to cut off contact with the catfish completely. Don’t give them time to explain themselves. They are looking for your attention and want to emotionally manipulate you into believing them. Instead, delete them from your social media and block their accounts. If you have given them your number then you can change it to make sure that you do not hear from them again. 

The faster you break the connection, the less likely they will do any more damage to you than they already have done.

Don’t get involved with a Catfish

Catfishes are extremely toxic people who have had a troubled background, which is why they feel the need to go online and hurt innocent people. Don’t fall for their games. Instead, think methodically when you go online and try to meet up with a new partner. If you can avoid all of the catfishes then there is more of a chance that you will be able to meet up with your dream partner. 

Good luck!